Emotional upheaval of surrogate mothers

Emotional upheaval of surrogate mothers

Being a surrogate mother is the splendid gift you can give a couple unable to conceive. By becoming a gestational surrogate mom, you are allowing a childless couple to experience the joy of parenthood. The couple can have a child with which they share the genetic heritage. But, whether you go for traditional or gestational surrogacy, the event will be life transformational. Surrogate moms do often bond with the child and this leads to a lot of emotional complicacy between the surrogate mom and the intended parents. The moment is too heart rending when the mom has to hand over the infant. Most of the surrogate moms report acute depression after parting with the child. The postpartum depression becomes so severe that medical attention is needed. Some mothers become so much attached to the infant that they refuse to give the child. But, this situation might have serious legal consequences. It is a legal issue when the mom changes her mind to hand over the infant. You need to consider how very strong you are.

Confusion, anger and sadness are intrinsic to surrogacy

The very fact that you need to part with the child and hand it over to the intending parents can make you frustrated, angry and sad. This can also result to acute depression requiring medical attention. The biological mom during nine months of pregnancy will definitely bond with the child. She will get emotionally attached to the child that is growing inside her.  For some moms, it is too much challenging to hand over the child. The feeling of loss can be impossible to bear. If you are in such a situation, take help from the counselors and professionals.

The family might get attached to the baby

It is not only the surrogate mother who is involved with the child, but also the family of the mom is involved. Even the spouse and the kids of the surrogate mom can get emotionally attached to the infant. The parents of the surrogate, the husband and the children get too much tied to the child. To relieve the tension to some extent, the family of the surrogate must be allowed to spend quality time with the infant.

Handling the law and the feelings

Legal issues can make everything even more difficult for the mother. If the mom has legal option to keep the infant, a lot of complicacies might arise. In most of the states, the law of surrogacy is not enforceable. This implies that the intending parents might fail to win the child after the birth. They have no right to claim the baby as such. Such a situation can further complicate the matter and make it worse.

Surrogacy is still a joyous occasion and experience

Despite all the negative emotions a mother needs to fight with, surrogacy is still a joyful experience. The very thought of helping a couple in dilemma can be enjoyable. There is no comparison to bringing a child for someone else in this world.

So, we may say that surrogate moms have to undergo a lot of emotions that include frustration, depression, anxiety, the feeling of loss. Indeed, such negative emotions may also get converted into the feeling of joy.

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